I Have A Difficult Bridesmaid
Let's be honest, we all know who she is. She has a problem with everything. The dress you picked for her to wear is uncomfortable, the bachelorette party costs too much, she hates to get up early for anything, and of course, no one - absolutely no one - knows how to do her hair and make up correctly. You're picturing her right now, and although you love her, you'd like to smack her. It's ok, I won't tell. Etiquette says you can't do that - so what can you do? It's your special time and dealing with someone who makes every step difficult can be a real challenge. Maybe she's your best friend, college roommate, or even your mom. Don't panic. This isn't our first rodeo and we know how to handle this. Read on for some of our best tips.
1. Remain open, honest and grateful. I know it's your special day but weddings can be a financial and time burden for some people. People love you and they want to be involved. They may be worried about the financial commitments associated with being in your wedding. One place they always like to cut corners is hair and make up and that's the best part. More on that in a minute. Try to be fair with the ladies, lay out all the prospective costs as far in advance as possible so they have time to prepare or decide if they cannot participate. Be sure to not let it go "bitchy". Just because you'd do it for her, doesn't mean she can do it for you. Be sure to remain grateful and understanding each step of the way, this will help to curb the 'tude from the start.
2. Don't underestimate the meaningfulness and fun of getting ready together as a group. That's why I say hair and make up is the best part. The music is going, the mimosas are flowing, everyone is laughing and having a good time. It's no fun if "bridesmaid" is off in another room doing her own hair and make up because she says she can't afford it. It's part of the whole experience. Even if they elect to do part of the service themselves, say hair and not make up, encourage them to bring their stuff in where we all are. We're not judgey, and we have always been willing to help a bridesmaid who forgot lash glue or who needed a curl retouched. On the flip side, if anyone is on the fence, try to persuade them to participate. I know $175 is a lot of money to some people, but it's about more than just the services. Everyone wants to look great and feel important on your big day. These pictures last a lifetime and the last thing your friend wants is to look back on photos of herself with bad hair or make up and remember that about the day.
3. Let the pros (us) handle it. Any member of your party who has hair or make up concerns is welcome to schedule a trial appointment with us in advance to discuss and try out hair and make up. Of course, we do charge for this service but if the client is that worried about it, it's probably a good idea. We always welcome communication via phone or e mail to discuss concerns as well free of charge. The combination of our personalities, our skills, our ability to handle difficult clients and our preparation makes us the best choice for these types of situations. We understand very well that some people require more attention than others. It's ok with us. We're a team and if Lauren is stuck with one client for an hour on her eye make up, I pick up the slack so the party stays on schedule. If we have a heads up, I will always schedule that particular client with me. We're prepared for this type of thing. I gladly take the responsibility off your hands for the day. We'll take care of it for you. We're not offended. It's part of our job and for every one difficult client we may have, we have 10 who are the opposite. That's how we remain grateful for any and every opportunity we have with our clients.
4. I have a special education background. I know this sounds like a weird point to make, but hear me out. Part of being a successful hair or make up artist is having the innate ability to connect with people. Most of us in this industry have that already because we put ourselves in a place to serve, to connect with people and make them feel good. Beyond that, being able to recognize when people have certain special needs is also important. This isn't a judgement. I am a control freak, a work-o-holic and anxiety ridden 5 out of 7 days of the week. I know first hand what it feels like to be disappointed with a beauty service I have received and to not trust who ever is doing it. I am the pickiest client you will ever find. I have a meticulous eye for detail so I can appreciate these qualities in someone else. Being a teacher in a special needs environment has taught me a lot about myself but also how to recognize issues in others and deal with them. Most of the time, people who are acting out just need to feel like they are being heard and their needs are being met. We do it with kind words, understanding hearts, patience of a saint and kick ass beauty services. I promise, we'll make them happy.
To wrap up, yes, we have difficult clients all the time. No, you are not the only one this is happening to. We can help you. Your day is so much bigger than this. We got this.
Peace, love and beauty - Allison